Jenny Kane: Coffee, cupcakes, chocolate and contemporary fiction / Jennifer Ash: Medieval crime with hints of Ellis Peters and Robin Hood

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Guest Blog by Eric McFarlane: A Clear Solution

I would like to welcome the wonderful Eric McFarlane to my blog today. I cannot wait to read his new release, A Clear Solution– being married to a scientist, who once lost his job in similar circumstances, I am sure I am going to be chuckling my way through the whole thing!!

Over to you Eric…

First of all thanks, Jenny, for allowing me to post on your blog.

I couldn’t quite believe it when I heard that my comic crime novel A Clear Solution had been accepted by Accent Press. The novel is a zany light-hearted comedy with a protagonist who always seems to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. Rather than blether on about the novel I thought I would say something about how it came into being as its gestation period was protracted.

A Clear Solution

A Clear Solution was born may years ago when I and my colleagues in the pharmaceutical company I worked in were given notice of redundancy. Devastating of course but the upside, although I didn’t recognise it at the time, was that, unusually, we were given five months notice during which the factory and my section would continue to tick over. I found that my own job, development and supervision, evaporated overnight. No more factory equated to no more development and I was left supervising a bunch of ‘old hands’ who needed little supervision. What to do?

Well, job hunting obviously and that I certainly did but that still left many hours to fill so… writing. I’d always written to some extent: notebooks filled with scribbles, short stories, travel, observation. So why not write a novel? After all novelists made lots of money, didn’t they? Write a novel and sell it. How difficult could it be? I cringe but, yes, I really was that naive.

So I started writing. It would be based in a laboratory – write what you know, and it was going to be a comedy. I’m not sure why but there it was. There was no planning, none at all. It just proceeded in a linear fashion with one situation leading to another. If stuck I asked myself what is the daftest thing that could happen at that point in the action?

Several jobs followed over the next few years and writing time dropped but I continued with the novel and wrote a flurry of short stories. Then I read a comment somewhere to the effect that there was no market for comedy. So why am I writing comedy? I dropped A Clear Solution (yes, I was that easily influenced) and started writing a thriller. This in turn was dropped when I had an idea for a novelisation of an SF short story I had written. Then, unbelievably to me now, I launched into yet another novel length project. At this point I stopped and gave myself a shake. You’ve got to finish something. So A Clear Solution it was, being the project nearest completion..

I completed it, typed the end and felt pleased with myself, then looked at what I had – a mess. So of course more months of fleshing up, cutting out and joining loose ends before I felt it was ready.

Over the previous few years I’d learned a lot about writing and the publishing industry and was no longer quite so naive, so when I sent the novel out to a couple of targeted agents I did not expect it to be instantly accepted and my expectations were met in full. During the next months and years more than fifty agents and publishers turned it down. It could have been dispiriting (OK, it was dispiriting) but there had been three handwritten notes during that time with positive comments. I’d also posted 7000 words on youwriteon.com review site and received some excellent feedback, in fact reaching the top 20 on that site in one month. If any writers are looking for feedback I’d recommend it – if you have thick skin. The comments can be brutally honest.

While this was going on I completed the thriller and the SF novel and began to look for interest in those.

I had consigned A Clear Solution to the back burner and decided that it was my candidate for self publication should I decide to take that road, when I heard about Accent Press looking for submissions in an article in Writing Magazine. They were looking for crime rather than humour, well the novel has crooked policemen and a number of suspicious deaths so why not? I sent it away and forgot about it.

I remembered about it during a holiday in Australia when checking my e-mails. There was a note from an Accent Press editor who was reading my submission and liked it. Could I send the rest? Could I? Well no, I couldn’t, not until I returned to the UK three weeks later but that didn’t seem to be a problem. The surreal element was that this editor, working for the Welsh Accent Press, was currently living not 50 miles from where I was staying in Melbourne.

So six months later here it is on the shelves. Difficult to believe. Now I have to persuade them to take the follow-on.

***

Blurb

Corpses, cats, and chemical catastrophes…it’s all just another day in the lab!

All that lab technician Daniel Dreghorn wants is a better job, more money, a new flat – oh, and perhaps to meet a few more girls. It’s not much to ask of life, is it? All his dreams are answered with one visit to a faulty cash machine, but is it too good to be true? Yes, Daniel, it is…

Daniel’s life goes from bad to mad as a series of deaths are attributed to him and some very shady characters start to believe he is more than he seems. As Daniel’s colleagues at the university become suspicious of his actions, madcap Professor Farquharson sees him as a way of achieving a long-held desire… Can Daniel avoid being drawn into his boss’s crazy schemes? Can he avoid the attentions of a bent copper? Are Dr Bernini’s doughnuts all they seem to be?

A Clear Solution is a hilarious look at what happens when you’re in the wrong place at the wrong time – complete with homicidal bank managers.

***

Buy link http://myBook.to/AClearSolution

Web www.ericmcfarlane.co.uk

Eric McFarlane

 

****

Many thanks for coming along today Eric,

I wish you much success with this novel, and the sequel!

Happy reading,

Jenny x

Coming Soon: Ben’s Biscuit Tin Adventure!

I’m delighted to be able to announce that my second children’s picture book, Ben’s Biscuit Tin Adventure will be out this summer!!!

Title Page

My quirky story of cookie sneaky retrieval has been brought to life by the brilliant illustrations of artist, Ryan Doherty.

Blurb

Ben’s stomach won’t stop rumbling in the middle of the night. As he lies in bed, Ben begins to plan how he can secretly sneak a biscuit from the biscuit tin.

But Ben is only seven, and rather short, and the biscuit tin is hidden at the very back of the highest shelf of the tallest cupboard in the kitchen. Working out how to reach the tin is going to take a lot of imagination…string, tape, springs, and maybe even some stilts…

Here’s one of Ryan’s lovely pictures!

page1 cupboard

Ben’s Biscuit Tin Adventure has come along after my first children’s book, There’s a Cow in the Flat (again with wonderful pictures from Ryan), caught the imagination of so many children.

cow in flat cover

I’ll bring you more information about Ben and his biscuit adventure very soon,

Happy reading,

Jenny xx

 

Novel Progress 7: Paper editing

The completion of Another Glass of Champagne – the fourth part of my Another Cup of… series grows nearer!! At the moment I’m deep into the edits. For me editing a novel is a five part process-

1. Read through draft on the computer

2. Print out the draft and edit on paper

3. Type in changes and edit as I type

4. Check that there isn’t word or plot repetition

5. Final read through- out loud

Novel edited

I have just completed part two of the editing process, and I am heading into part three…while helping to run, and take part in, the Tiverton Literary Festival. I am incapable of only doing one thing at once!!

Editing at this stage of novel writing is my favourite part of the process. I just love the feeling of being almost there- of polishing it up- of making it every word count…before time runs out!

Another Glass of Champagne_edited-1

Happy reading everyone!

Jenny xx

Tiverton Literary Festival: Cupcakes, Crime, Poetry, & Romance at The Oak Room

Today I had the great pleasure of attending the official opening of a brand new venue in Tiverton, Devon- The Oak Room – which will be the prime location for the Tiverton Literary Festival. (3rd -7th June)

Oak Room 3

A converted church, there has been a church on the site of The Oak Room since 166o. The current building, made of imposing limestone, was built in 1831. It was used as a United Reformed Church until 2012, when the church was put up for sale. In 2014 Sue Searle, bought the church with a view to converting it into a café, art gallery and events venue- and she has done an amazing job!!

Sue Searle on the Oak Room stage

Sue Searle on the Oak Room stage

Why not come along on 3rd June and join the Cupcakes and Romance panel? With a cupcake to hand, come and listen to bestselling authors Julie Cohen (Where Love Lies), Alison Rose, (Off the Record), and Rachel Brimble (What a Woman Desires), chat to me about their work, their writing, and their inspiration. You’ll have the opportunity to ask questions of your own, and find out just what makes their imaginations spark a heart warming tale.

Julie Cohen

Julie Cohen

Or perhaps you fancy sipping a latte while listening to some of the countries best crime writers?

Simon Hall

Simon Hall

Poet and journalist Paul Mortimer, will be hosting an hour of murder, suspense and dodgy dealings, as bestselling crime writers, Simon Hall (The TV Detective Novels), Nicola Upson (The Josephine Tey novels) and Clare Donoghue (The Watcher), talk about committing crimes via the pen and computer keyboard. There will be a chance to ask your own questions, enjoy refreshments, and purchase some books.

Oak Room 4

Coffee at The Oak Room

Paul Mortimer will also be at the Oak Room for an evening of outstanding and award winning poetry from the Poetry Café and Junction 25 team.

poetry cafe

On Thursday 4th June join award winning and, bestselling author, Michael Jecks, for a light hearted look at the life of a writer. Reflecting on a career spent with one foot in the Fourteenth Century fighting the Hundred Year’s War (often with murderous intent never far behind), and the other foot in Devon, scribbling words at high speed, Michael raises a glass to a life only half lived in reality. With a talk entitled ’20 Writing Questions’ I can guarantee an evening of smiles!!

Michael Jecks

Michael Jecks

There are many many more literary events being held at The Oak Room, and throughout Tiverton town as a whole, between 3rd and 7th June- just checkout the web site for details www.tivlitfest.co.uk

tivvibadge_websiteThe Oak Room

Tickets are available from www.tivlitfest.co.uk , or from Tiverton Library, Reapers Wholefoods on Bampton Street, and Majestic Wines, Tiverton.

Hope to see you there!!

Jenny xx

 

 

Guest Post for A SPELL IN PROVENCE by Marie Laval: Little Time Bubbles

I’m pleased to welcome Marie Laval to my site today, to talk about capturing the senses within her fabulous novel, A Spell in Provence.

Over to you Marie…

LITTLE TIME BUBBLES

As writers we know how important it is to use the five senses – sight, smell, taste, touch and sound – to bring scenes and characters to life and immerse the reader in the story. The sense of smell is, I think, the most magical, powerful and nostalgic of all senses. A fleeting, ephemeral scent can make us travel back in time and bring people and emotions back to life – if only for a few seconds. It can make us smile or cry, it can be soothing or reopen old wounds. There are scents many of us can identify and relate to. A writer uses scents to give the reader a more intense feel for a particular place, time or scene. Some smells may be a little ‘cliché’ but still work. The smell of burning leaves reminds us of autumn. Orange peel, cinnamon and clove take us back to winter and Christmas, and freshly-cut grass evokes spring and summer. As for flowers and plants, many readers will know the scent of roses, lilac, wisteria, lilies, to name but a few. A scene describing a walk in the countryside will feel more real if it includes scents, for example woods carpeted with wild garlic and bluebells or with damp, rotten leaves; a deep forest of fir trees with pine needles on the ground; the scent of grass and earth after a spring shower.

ASpellinProvence3

In A SPELL IN PROVENCE, my contemporary romantic suspense published by Áccent Press, Amy Carter buys an old farmhouse with a garden overgrown with wild flowers, rosemary, thyme and lavender – scents we all associate with Provence and the south of France. The scent of pine from the nearby cedar forest changes from fresh and invigorating at the start of the story to dark and overpowering as Bellefontaine’s mystery deepens. To help make characters unique and bring them to life we often give them a unique fragrance. I do confess to a predilection for sandalwood for my heroes, and vanilla, rose, jasmine or orange blossom for my heroines. In A SPELL IN PROVENCE, Amy Carter is very liberal in her use of Bourbon Vanilla bubble bath. In DANCING FOR THE DEVIL, my historical romance to be released by Áccent Press in June, my heroine loves orange blossom cologne because it reminds her of her village in the Sahara. I always have these fragrances at hand when I write to remind myself of the characters I have created.

http://www.dreamstime.com/stock-photos-beautiful-landscape-provence-france-abbaye-de-senanque-near-village-gordes-vaucluse-region-image40478843

Other distinctive scents can also help define a character’s habits and personality, for example tobacco, cigarette and cigar smoke which cling to their clothes, or the smell of brandy, whisky or mint pastilles which lingers on their breath. And let’s not forget leather… Perfumes can be associated with happy, traumatic or painful memories and the emotions some trigger are so personal they can be difficult to capture and communicate. To this day I cannot be near a woman wearing Guerlain’s Shalimar without thinking of my mother because it was her favourite perfume. Food smells are incredibly evocative too. Freshly baked bread, tomato and garlic sauce, or freshly baked fruit tarts, especially apricots (we had an apricot tree in the garden), will always remind me of childhood and home. If I close my eyes, I can almost hear my mother sing in the kitchen. So fragrances can be like little time bubbles or time machines allowing us to revisit places and moments in time, whether we want it or not.

provence-market-173065_1280

A SPELL IN PROVENCE Blurb

With few roots in England and having just lost her job, Amy Carter decides to give up on home and start a new life in France, spending her redundancy package turning an overgrown Provençal farmhouse, Bellefontaine, into a successful hotel. Though she has big plans for her new home, none of them involves falling in love – least of all with Fabien Coste, the handsome but arrogant owner of a nearby château.  As romance blossoms, eerie and strange happenings in Bellefontaine hint at a dark mystery of the Provençal countryside which dates back many centuries and holds an entanglement between the ladies of Bellefontaine and the ducs de Coste at its centre. As Amy works to unravel the mystery, she begins to wonder if it may not just be her heart at risk, but her life too.

You can find A SPELL IN PROVENCE on Amazon

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Spell-Provence-Marie-Laval-ebook/dp/B00RVQO8RM/ref=sr_1_10?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1421344692&sr=1-10&keywords=accent+press

and

http://www.amazon.com/A-Spell-Provence-Marie-Laval-ebook/dp/B00RVQO8RM

You can also buy it in print at

http://www.accentpress.co.uk/Book/13421/A-Spell-in-Provence.html

****

MarieLaval (2)

Marie Laval Bio

Originally from Lyon in France, Marie studied History and Law at university there before moving to Lancashire in England where she worked in a variety of jobs, from PA in a busy university department to teacher of French in schools and colleges. Writing, however, was always her passion, and she spends what little free time she has dreaming and making up stories. Her historical romances ANGEL HEART and THE LION’S EMBRACE are published by MuseItUp Publishing. A SPELL IN PROVENCE is her first contemporary romance. It is published by Áccent Press.

***

Many thanks for writing us such a great blog Marie. Good luck with A Spell in Provence.

Happy reading,

Jenny xx

 

 

Writing Champagne, with a Coffee Cup to Hand

Okay- I admit it, I have a serious coffee shop habit! I am addicted- not just to the caffeine- but to the coffee and teashops themselves. I just love them- all of them! I love to watch the people around me, to smile at strangers to see how they respond, to wrap my hands around a coffee mug and inhale the aroma of the drink within. For me, there is something very soothing about these places. Whether they are jammed packed and noisy, or as quiet as the proverbial grave, with myself as the only coffee swiller in residence, I simply feel at home in cafes.

Coffee - The Courtyard- Wiv

It won’t surprise you to learn then, that every novel I have ever written has taken shape in various coffee shops up and down the UK. I can’t write at home, with the distractions of ironing and dusting, so I pen all my words at cafe tables. There is even a plaque on the wall of my cafe, denoting where I write! It seemed totally natural to me therefore, that when it came to creating my first non-erotic novel, to make a coffee shop the focal point of the story.

Another Glass of Champagne_edited-1

For the last five months, I’ve been sat at my usual table in a local coffee shop each day, working on my latest novel, Another Glass of Champagne, the fourth in my Another Cup of… series.

It is eighteen months since the first in this contemporary romance series, Another Cup of Coffee, was released. I never dreamt it would become a series! (Book 2 – Another Cup of Christmas. Book 3- Christmas in the Cotswolds)

ACOChristmas- New 2015CITC- New cover 2015

Another Cup of Coffee Blurb-

Thirteen years ago Amy Crane ran away from everyone and everything she knew, ending up in an unfamiliar city with no obvious past and no idea of her future. Now, though, that past has just arrived on her doorstep, in the shape of an old music cassette that Amy hasn’t seen since she was at university.

Digging out her long-neglected Walkman, Amy listens to the lyrics that soundtracked her student days. As long-buried memories are wrenched from the places in her mind where she’s kept them safely locked away for over a decade, Amy is suddenly tired of hiding.

It’s time to confront everything about her life. Time to find all the friends she left behind in England, when her heart got broken and the life she was building for herself was shattered. Time to make sense of all the feelings she’s been bottling up for all this time. And most of all, it’s time to discover why Jack has sent her tape back to her now, after all these years…

With her mantra, ‘New life, New job, New home’, playing on a continuous loop in her head, Amy gears herself up with yet another bucket-sized cup of coffee, as she goes forth to lay the ghost of first love to rest…

 Another Cup of Coffee - New cover 2015

The coffee shop that features most within Another Cup of Coffee is Pickwicks, a tucked away cafe in Richmond, run by the ever bubbly Peggy, and her husband Scott. It is there that, newly arrived in London from Scotland, Amy Crane finds a refuge from her troubles, a temporary job, a possible future, and a potential friend in Kit.

In my latest work in progress (which should be out in early 2016), Amy, Jack, Kit and the Pickwicks crew are all five years older. Life has dealt them each a life changing situation to overcome- all of which should (if things go to plan), lead to the chance to celebrate…

Of course, until I have consumed a great deal more coffee myself, and edited at least another 80,000 words, the Pickwicks regulars won’t be getting anyway near that glass of champagne!!

***

If you’d like to read Another Cup of Coffee, you can buy it from all good bookshops, as well as from…

http://www.amazon.com/Another-Cup-Of-Coffee-contemporary-ebook/dp/B00EVYZC7M/ref=pd_sim_kstore_1?ie=UTF8&refRID=15EFJ85882KQYAJ71KED

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Another-Cup-Of-Coffee-contemporary-ebook/dp/B00EVYZC7M/ref=pd_sim_kinc_4?ie=UTF8&refRID=12DHKX85NFP0DNJJCKDS 

Happy reading,

Jenny x

Novel Progress 6: Concluding

A special kind of feeling occurs when I can see the end of a novel draft in sight. It’ a very physical thing- my fingertips tingle as if I have mild pins and needles, I type faster, my heart rate speeds a fraction (possibly due to increased coffee consumption)- oh, and I can’t stop smiling.

I want to reach the end, the goal post of the concluding sentence- and yet, at the same time I don’t want to get there. Being lost in the world that I’ve been creating- the lives of my fictitious friends- is a comfortable place to be. The moment I place that final full stop in place I have to step back- remove myself a little from the world I’ve invented. And that is precisely where I am with the fourth in my Another Cup of… series- for today I have placed the last word of Another Glass of Champagne on the computer screen!

Another Glass of Champagne_edited-1

This distancing myself from my own creation is vital for the next stage of the novel. For the completion of the final sentence is far from the end of a the writing story. Now comes the redraft- the polishing- the editing- the objective overview of my work. It’s time to make sure that every word is perfect for the job it has to do, that all the story threads have been tied up, that the time scale between events is physically possible, and then to track down and remove as many typos as humanly possible!

So while the conclusion brings me a feeling of immense satisfaction – it also heralds in the next stage. A process I enjoy a great deal- Another Glass of Champagne is about to be edited to within an inch of its life…

Happy reading,

Jenny xx

 

Guest Post from Della Galton: The Morning After the Life Before

Writing The Morning After The Life Before was probably one of the worst commercial decisions of my writing career. I knew when I began it – after discussions with my agent – that this book would not be taken on by a big mainstream publisher. Why? Because they deemed its predecessor, Ice and a Slice, not suitable to be sold in a supermarket. They felt it ‘showed alcohol in a bad light’ and might upset their alcohol advertisers. Who knew that supermarkets had so much control over the publishing industry? Tongue firmly in cheek.

Morning After

But… and this is a big but… Why do novelists write books? Love? Money? Fame? Well, for me, this one was a no brainer. It’s feedback from my readers. I have been touched beyond words by the number of people who have emailed and messaged me and left reviews on Amazon for Ice and a Slice. Thank you so much if you are among them.

Knowing you have written a book that has changed people’s lives – in a good way – and that has helped them to face their own demons is priceless. Many, many people asked me if I was writing a sequel to Ice and A Slice. In the end I simply couldn’t not write one. I wrote this novel for all of those people. Once again, I have used my own experiences – as well as researching thoroughly the bits I don’t know about. I do NOT – just for the record – know anything about being a dominatrix. Neither have I ever had a cocaine addiction. Or some of the other wackier things that happen in this novel. But I do know a lot about heartbreak and friendship and love.

ice

 

Heartbreak and friendship and love are some of the themes that run through this novel.

Without giving too much away and spoiling the book for you – The Morning After the Life Before is about how SJ copes – four and a half years on – with sobriety when it seems as though the whole world – even God – is against her.

Will she even cope? Or will she cave in under the pressure?

I must admit I didn’t know the answer to this one when I set out.

And I’m not about to reveal the ending. But here is the beginning.

Chapter One

SJ gave a very deep sigh and glanced once more at the phone. For the last two hours and twenty-two minutes, not that she was counting, the phone had become the focal point of her front room. No, not just her front room – her entire life.

The phone had sat in its cradle on the table by the television. She had sat on the sofa next to it, flicking surreptitious glances at it, while pretending to read Cosmopolitan and occasionally getting up to check that the display was still working in case there was a power cut.

“What if there is a power cut?” she’d said to Penny when they’d done the handover. “I have the plug-in kind of phone – it won’t work unless it has power.”

“I wouldn’t worry – they’ll phone back.”

“But what if they don’t? I thought you said it’s a matter of life and death. What if they’ve spent the last three weeks plucking up the courage to phone the helpline and this is their final desperate plea for help and then no one answers because there’s a power cut. What if they die?”

“They might die anyway,” Penny pointed out, with unnecessary sharpness, SJ thought, considering she was only trying to get things right. And considering that Penny had actually said – when she’d been trying to persuade SJ to sign up for phone service – that the helpline was a matter of life and death.

“We are the fifth emergency service,” she’d said, a mite pompously, SJ had thought. Especially as she hadn’t bothered to explain what she meant. Clearly, as everyone knew, police, ambulance and fire were the first three emergency services. But what was the fourth? And why weren’t they the fourth?

It was slightly crushing to realise that the Alcoholics Anonymous helpline couldn’t be all that important. Not if they were only the fifth.

“What if I miss the phone ringing because I’m out of the room – say I’m in the bathroom?” SJ had asked.

“I thought you said you had a carry-around phone.” There was a gleam of triumph in Penny’s voice.

“Yes I do, but if there was a power cut I’d be using my back up phone. My in-case-of-emergency, old fashioned, plug-straight-into-the-mains phone, wouldn’t I? So I won’t be able to carry that around, obviously.” SJ sighed patiently and resisted the urge to add, ‘so what have you got to say to that then, Miss Goody Two Shoes, know-it-all, pompous Penny?’ Which she would have done without hesitation once when someone like Penny wound her up.

But which she couldn’t do now because she was no longer that person any more. She was no longer judgmental and impatient and prickly – which she’d only ever been because she was lacking in self-esteem obviously. These days, she was serene and calm and peaceful. Serenity was her middle name. She’d considered, in fact, making Serenity her actual middle name by deed poll. Only there didn’t seem much point because no one ever asked you what your middle name was anyway. And deed polls were probably expensive.

“Someone might be trying to get through right now while we’re talking,” Penny said wearily.

“Right. I see. Yes, okay. Point taken.”

“Someone might be dying right now. So maybe if I could just put the phone down, SJ? Please – if you’re ready to take over. Are you?”

“Of course. Sorry. Um bye.”

“Goodbye, SJ.”

Penny disconnected. The phone rang almost immediately and SJ was so surprised she dropped the handset. Then when she reached to pick it up she knocked over her cup of calming peppermint tea which was on the glass-topped coffee table between her and the phone. Oh crap. The phone was still ringing. The tea pooled across the glass and began to drip down the wooden leg.

Double crap. What if there was some raging, desperate, suicidal alcoholic on the other end of the phone? What if they were pissed off because they hadn’t been able to get through? What if they shouted at her? What if they were an utter maniac? Don’t judge, SJ. Deep breaths, in, out, in, out, in, out. Try to stay calm. Serene and calm is where it’s at. If you feel serene your voice will be serene. Nothing to it. She punched the green button with a finger, intending to say, ‘Yep,’ in that ultra-cool voice that ultra-cool receptionists – usually the ones that worked in PR and marketing companies – were fond of using.

What actually came out of her mouth wasn’t yep. It was yip. She tried again. “Yip, yep, yip, yap.” Oh crap. Now she sounded like the next door neighbour’s Jack Russell terrier.

“SJ it’s me.” Penny’s voice held a note of incredulity. “I’m just – er checking that the phone line transferred okay. “Is – everything all right?”

“It’s fine. Absolutely fine. Couldn’t be better. Sorry, I was practising my – um – my dog whisperer voice. I’m doing evening classes.”

“You’re doing evening classes in dog whispering!”

“Yep. I mean yip. Yip yip, yap, yippety yip – ha ha! What do you think?”

“Very – er – authentic, but do you suppose you could do it when you’re not answering the helpline?”

“Of course. Sure. Sorry.”

SJ disconnected and put her head in her hands, before realising belatedly that her elbows were now in a pool of peppermint tea. Fantastic. Why had she ever thought she could do this? She must be mad. She shouldn’t have volunteered. She should have contented herself with making tea at meetings or acting as treasurer. Even she couldn’t make too much of a hash-up of that. What did she know about giving up drinking anyway? What was she going to say to someone if they did phone up the AA helpline? Oh it’s easy – you just swap your vodka for a mug of peppermint tea. Nothing to it. No one was going to believe that, were they? Everyone knew it wasn’t easy to give up. Not when you’d been drinking on a daily basis for months, or years, or possibly even decades.

She’d only managed to give up because she’d had an utterly brilliant counsellor who she’d gone to see, week after week after week. And let’s face it she probably wouldn’t have done that if he hadn’t also been utterly gorgeous and if she hadn’t also had the most humungous crush on him. Would she have given up drinking at all if she hadn’t fallen in love with her counsellor?

Ironically, it was the thought of the utterly gorgeous Kit that snapped her out of the beating herself up mood she’d fallen into. She cleared up the peppermint tea spillage – grabbed her iPad from the kitchen and found her latest To Do list. At the top of the page she wrote:

Things not to say when answering the AA helpline

  1. Yip or yap, or yippety yip – or any possible derivative of the word yip.
  2. Yep. (Mainly because it was very hard to inject a decent amount of empathy and sympathy and understanding into the word yep. Yes with a question mark would be better – or yeah if you stretched it out a bit or maybe even yo – that was a pretty cool word around youngsters, these days. Except that yo didn’t sound very sympathetic either. Yo dude – you gotta problem with your drinking? Hey that’s tough. And anyway she wasn’t exactly young. Forty-two might be the answer to life, the universe and everything – but as an age it was well over the hill. How on earth had she got to forty-two anyway?)
  3. “Hello, this is the Alcoholics Anonymous helpline – how can I help?”

That would have made the most sense. But unfortunately she couldn’t say that in case it was her mother phoning, or her sister, Alison, or her best friend, Tanya. Not that her mother and her sister and Tanya didn’t know she was a recovering alcoholic. But there were people in her life, these days, who didn’t know. And it wasn’t the sort of thing she wanted to advertise when she answered her own phone. That was the trouble – she had no way of telling whether she was answering a call diverted from the helpline or whether it was someone who wanted to speak to her. It was a conundrum.

Although not that much of one because the phone hadn’t rung for – what – coming up for three hours now anyway. Soon her phone service shift would be over and she could go back to doing her housework or planning her Poetry and a Pint session. In fact, what the heck, why didn’t she do that now? What was she waiting for?

She had barely reached the door when the phone began to ring. SJ stared at it in surprise. She wasn’t imagining it, was she? It was ringing? She took a deep breath and strolled back into the room. This time she was going to get it right. She would be pleasant, polite, with a touch of concern. She would be relaxed, calm, the model helpline attendant. She felt her chest swell a little with pride at the thought. This was her chance to make a difference.

She picked up the phone. “Hello, can I help you?” Oh so simple – why hadn’t she thought of that before?

“Hello,” the girl’s voice was tearstained. “Is that the AA?”

“Yes it is.”

There was a small silence and SJ wondered if she’d sounded sympathetic enough. Maybe she’d been a bit matter of fact, or even abrupt. She sat back down on the sofa, pressing the phone close to her ear. “Are you okay?” she said softly.

“I don’t think I am,” said the girl and now she sounded so scared and so vulnerable that SJ forgot all about herself and how she was coming across and she just wanted to say something, anything that would help – even if it was only for a few moments, a few seconds.

“You’ve done the hardest part,” she said. “You’ve just phoned for help. You’ve made a phone call that could save your life. I know how hard it is to do that. I did it myself once.”

“Did you used to drink a lot then? I mean, really a lot. I don’t just mean wine. I mean, well, bottles and bottles of voddie?” The girl’s voice grew a little fainter and SJ realised she’d drawn away from the phone. She could hear sounds in the background, the clink of a bottle against a glass and the unmistakable glug of liquid.

“Are you drinking now?”

“No,” the girl said. There was a pause and SJ heard her swallowing and the slur in her voice when she spoke again. “No, I’m not drinking. I’m not phoning for myself. I’m phoning about a friend.”

“And is your friend able to come to the phone, honey?”

Another pause to swallow. “No – not really. She’s er… she’s asleep. Maybe when she wakes up.”

“Sure,” SJ said, knowing there was no friend. “So tell me about you. Are you okay?”

There was another long pause followed by a little beep and SJ realised as she held the phone away from her ear again that the display was blank – that the girl had hung up. She sat back on the sofa feeling terribly sad and also a little sick. So her very first call and she’d done nothing. Nothing at all. Somewhere out there was a very scared, very lonely, very drunk young girl and she – SJ – had been utterly powerless to help her.

***

And if you’d like to read on for a mere £1.99 – less than the price of a glass of Chardonnay! Please click here.

Thank you 🙂

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Bio

Della Galton is a novelist, short story writer, and journalist.  Writing is her passion.When she is not writing she enjoys walking her dogs in the beautiful Dorset countryside where she lives.

Ice and a Slice

The Morning After The Life Before

della

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Many thanks Della, for a fabulous blog!!!

Happy reading,

Jenny xx

 

 

Coming Soon: The Tiverton Literary Festival

Between the 3rd and 7th of June this year, Tiverton in Devon, will be hosting its very first literary festival!

tivvibadge_website

I am delighted to be one of the organisers, along with fellow author Kerstin Muggeridge, and the town mayor, Susie Griggs.

tivlitfest_organisers

When we took this venture on, we weren’t at all sure if any one would want to take part- how wrong we were! We have been so overwhelmed with authors wanting to take part that the festival has already expanded from being a two day affair to a five day celebration of books, reading, writing and the imagination.

Over the next few weeks I’ll be sharing more details about the festival, as we confirm more and more guests. But I can already announce a fantastic romance panel with the brilliant Julie Cohen, Rachel Brimble and Alison Rose, hosted by yours truly at the gorgeous Oak Room in Tiverton (3rd June, 7pm)

Julie Cohen

Julie Cohen

There will be an exclusive talk by the wonderful medieval murder mystery writer, Michael Jecks, about Devon in the Hundred Years War, at The Oak Room in Tiverton (4th June 7pm)

Michael Jecks

Michael Jecks

Saturday 6th June sees a jam packed day full of children’s stories, fancy dress competitions, a best selling author packed crime panel (with Simon Hall, Nicola Upson, Cal Moriarty and Clare Donaghue),- and then there is a family literary quiz at the Costa café on Bampton Street.

Simon Hall

Simon Hall

There will be a number of workshops for writing fiction, screen writing, self publishing and children’s story writing, as well as much much more!

Keep an eye on the web site for all the latest events and the forthcoming ticket sales!!

Come back soon for more news!

Happy reading,

Jenny xxx

 

The Lovely Blog Hop!

The Lovely Blog Hop

I’ve been invited by the wonderful Rachel Brimble to join in the Lovely Blog Hop. This blog hop is intended to let you in on a few of the lesser-known things about my life that have helped make me who I am.

First Memory

At the risk of starting on a negative note- my earliest memory is of being hit by a car when I was 3 years old!! It was my own fault- I should not have been playing in the road. I vividly remember the smell of smoke and petrol as I was hit, and then waking up in Bristol Royal Infirmary with a broken collar bone, and a giant poster of Noddy and Big Ears on the wall opposite my hospital bed.

Books

It won’t surprise you to know that I adore reading, and my home is packed with books. With the exception of Horror and Dark Fantasy (I scare too easy!), I read all genres. I like the variety of reading one of Terry Pratchett’s Dicworld novels one week, and then a Carol Hedges Victorian mystery the next.

Although I occasionally read romance, I usually avoid reading the genres I write myself very often- too much like a busman’s holiday!

At the moment I’m reading The Strings of Murder by Oscar de Muriel

Strings Murder

Libraries/Bookshops

My very first holiday job as a student was at Melksham Library in Wiltshire. I loved that job so much, that I went on to work for a large number of public libraries and a university library once I’d left education.Bookshops are dangerous places for me- I just want to buy everything! The very smell of them – the feel- the atmosphere. It’s so special. I love bookshops- it’s as simple as that!

What’s Your Passion?

Writing- no question. I’m not truly me unless I have got at least a few words written on a page first thing in the morning. I’m dreadful at taking holidays- I get so grumpy without my daily wordage!

Beyond the world of writing, I adore history- especially anything medieval. I have a lifelong obsession with Robin Hood!

 RH- RoS 2

Learning

I was very lucky to have the opportunity to do GCSE Archaeology while I was at school. This led to me taking Archaeology as one of my A’levels, and then for my degree at University.

My degree was the most amazing fun! I got to travel widely, and help excavate a range of sites. My moment of Indiana Jones style glory came when I was helping dig a Roman town in Wales. I was the first person to see, and then stand on, a pavement from a Roman forum for over 1000 years!

arch tools

After my degree I was lucky enough to be able to indulge one of my main passions in life- Robin Hood- by doing a PhD on the subject!! (You can read some of my research in my novel Romancing Robin Hood!)

Writing

My first short story was published in 2005, in a book of erotic short stories (under the name Kay Jaybee). That tale was the first story I’d written since childhood, and I had no expectations of it being taken. If it hadn’t been accepted for publication, then perhaps I wouldn’t have tried to write another one- but here I am, ten years later, with 2 identities (Kay Jaybee and Jenny Kane), over 100 publications, both long and short, and 2 new novels on the way!!- Abi’s House (out June 2015) and Another Glass of Champagne (out Jan 2016)

Abi's House_edited-1

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Thanks for stopping by today! If you’d like to read some more on the lovely blog hop circuit, check out:

Laura Wilkinson- https://lauracwilkinson.wordpress.com/2015/04/15/my-lovely-blog-hop/

Happy reading,

Jenny xxx

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